Cat nap while holding.

A Time Warner Cable technician replacing a defective cable modem was left on hold with the cable company so long, he fell asleep on the customer’s couch.

While the customer waited in another room, he could hear the technician calling Time Warner Cable’s customer service line to register and activate the new modem.

“I could hear the hold music from his call because he had it on speaker and eventually after about 15 minutes of listening to it from the other room, I walked out to find him like that,” writes the Reddit user DrinkingWhiteRussian. “Before doing anything, I grabbed my phone and snapped the pic, and then said ‘Excuse me?’ He startled a little bit, pointed to his phone and said ‘Sorry man, still on hold.'”

About 10 minutes later, a representative finally appeared on the line and presumably activated the modem. Only after the technician left did the customer realize nobody bothered to register the all-important MAC address in Time Warner’s system, which forced the customer to call and start the process all over again. After more lengthy hold time, a national Time Warner rep transferred the call to a local Time Warner office, which promptly transferred the customer back to the national call center.

“The guy that I got this time saw that they had never deactivated the original modem that was replaced,” says the disgruntled customer. “I despise Time Warner.”

One former Time Warner Cable tech explained many Time Warner Cable techs now call the same customer service line you do, and if you have ever been left on hold forever, so have the company’s own technicians and installers.

“I’ve spent up to an hour on hold after I completed a job just waiting to talk to someone in the call center so they can flip the switch and turn on your equipment,” wrote the former technician.

It isn’t known if the napping technician is a Time Warner Cable employee or one of their contractors.

Thanks to our regular reader PreventCAPS for the news tip.

Since 2005, five cable and telephone companies and their respective lobbying trade associations have donated nearly $12 million to New York politicians, making Big Telecom companies among the biggest political donors in the state. Now a government reform group wants an investigation by the state’s anti-corruption commission.

By exploiting giant loopholes in New York’s campaign finance laws, telecom companies that used to live with annual campaign finance limits of $5,000 are now donating millions to powerful political leaders in Albany – the majority conferences in the legislature, the state party committees, and the governor. Some are using secretive “housekeeping” accounts controlled by political parties. Others hide behind shadowy contributions from “limited liability corporations” (LLCs) established by some of the state’s biggest cable and phone companies and treated under current law as living, breathing people.

“Big Telecom exemplifies the pay-to-play culture which has come to define Albany, giving generously to the leadership in exchange for veto power over bills which favor the public interest,” said Common Cause-New York executive director Susan Lerner.

The Optimum donor to state “housekeeping” accounts among telecom providers is Cablevision.

No telecom company donates more in New York than Cablevision, which has given more than $5.3 million in contributions to state politicians since 2005 as it fights its way through union problems, fierce competition from Verizon, and complaints from subscribers about rising cable prices and questionable service. The cable company doesn’t just donate in name-only. Common Cause-NY discovered Cablevision using eight different LLCs to evade contribution limits, handing over $1.5 million to candidates and committees. Gov. Andrew Cuomo received $130,000 from four different Cablevision-controlled LLCs between July and October 2010. On April 29 of this year, former Nassau County executive Tom Suozzi’s campaign received $190,000 from three Cablevision-controlled LLCs on that single day.

Verizon (82%) and Time Warner Cable (70%) prefer to quietly give the largest percentage of their political donations to the parties’ secretive, soft money “housekeeping” accounts. The Republican and Democratic recipients are not using the money to buy Endust, mops or spare light bulbs, although the average voter might assume as much.

Corporations with an agenda just love New York’s hush-hush “housekeeping” accounts because they come without dollar limits or complete disclosure about how the money was ultimately spent.

The State Board of Elections says “housekeeping” money is supposed to go toward maintaining a party’s headquarters and staff or “ordinary activities that are not for the express purpose of promoting the candidacy of specific candidates.” Unfortunately, nobody bothered to require detailed accounting, allowing funds to disappear down a political rabbit hole, to be distributed at each party’s discretion.

Comcast (59%) and AT&T (53%) are considerably smaller players, in part because neither company serves many wired cable/broadband customers in New York.

Verizon’s corporate PAC also likes to raise relatively large numbers of small contributions given in the name of company executives or employees, not necessarily mentioning the company itself. Campaign finance disclosures may list only the individuals’ contribution(s), not the company that signed their paycheck.

Where does all the money go?

Common Cause-NY says most of the money is channeled to the most influential politicians in the state, with minority parties and unelected candidates typically getting much less.

To gain influence on the state level, Big Telecom companies contribute to the governor, attorney general, and the majority parties controlling the state Assembly and Senate, with Republicans getting the lion’s share (over $3.5 million) in the Senate and Democrats (over $1.6 million) in the Assembly.

For local issues of interest to the state’s local cable and phone companies, contributions are funneled to influential county-level political machines, perhaps helpful in making life difficult for a competing Wi-Fi project, a municipal fiber network, or helping to cut red tape to place a cell tower in a controversial location.

The top six recipients of Big Telecom’s political cash in the legislature:

• Key Party Leaders: Dean Skelos ($117,700), Tom Libous ($57,150), Jeff Klein ($49,450), and Sheldon Silver ($32,749.61)
• Current and former Chairs of the Senate Energy and Telecom Committee: George Maziarz ($79,718.02) and Kevin Parker ($34,444.00).

Common Cause-NY notes the corporations involved don’t give money without expecting something in return. After generous contribution checks were deposited, a number of telecom consumer protection bills mysteriously died in committee or never made it to the floor. The same fate did not meet bills offering special tax breaks for cable and Internet Service Providers that have cost New York taxpayers nearly $500 million and counting.

“Multi-million dollar campaign contributions clearly help Big Telecom maintain the status quo of corporate control, high prices, and lax regulation,” Common Cause-NY concludes.

The legislature is rife with examples of bills that would have likely passed with popular support but suddenly or “mysteriously” didn’t:

• A 7635-A / S5630-A: Establishes a moratorium on telephone corporations on the replacement of landline telephone service with a wireless system.
  • The “VoiceLink” moratorium bill, passed the Assembly, had broad bi-partisan support in the Senate but never came to a vote.
• S542: Relates to enacting the “Save New York Call Center Jobs Act of 2013,” which requires prior notice of relocation of call center jobs from New York to a foreign country; directs the Commissioner of Labor to maintain a list of employers who move call center jobs; prohibits loans or grants.
  • The “Call Center Jobs Act” would take away tax breaks and state grants if companies move a call center to another country. The bill passed the Assembly in 2012 (A9809) and had bipartisan support in Senate but was blocked. The 2013 bill died in Senate committee.
• A6003/S5577 — Directs the Department of Public Service to study and report on the current status of cable television systems providing services over fiber optic cables.
  • Bipartisan support in Assembly for further oversight of broadband but gets little support in Senate, the same bill was also blocked in 2012.
• A5234/S1075 — Enacts the “Roadway Excavation Quality Assurance Act” demanding utility companies or their contractors shall use competent workers and shall pay the prevailing wage on projects where a permit to use or open a street is required to be issued.
  • Bipartisan support in the Senate and Assembly but no passage in either 2012 and 2013.
• A6239/S4550 — Creates the State Office of the Utility Consumer Advocate to represent interests of residential utility customers.
  • Bipartisan support in Assembly, dies in Senate.
• A6757/S4449 — Requires providers of electric, gas, steam, telephone and cable television services to issue standardized bills to residential customers; provides the standards for such bills shall be established by the Public Service Commission.
  • Bipartisan support, passes Assembly, dies in Senate.

Comcast is in hog heaven thanks to Pennsylvania’s generous handouts from its corporate welfare system.

This week, Philadelphia residents are pondering why the city is hounding entrepreneurs and middle class, at-home workers with new taxes and fees while the nation’s largest and richest cable company, Comcast, is receiving enormous tax breaks and government handouts.

Welcome to the United Corporations of America, where taxpayers front at least $80 billion in corporate welfare handouts, according to the New York Times. Comcast is the fourth biggest recipient of corporate welfare in Pennsylvania, dwarfed only by a giant oil company and two Hollywood studios that have learned how to cash in by filming movies inside the Keystone State. The average Pennsylvanian contributes $381 in taxes per year that gets diverted to multi-billion dollar corporations. At least 18 cents of every dollar in the state budget is now spent on corporate welfare programs.

The budget busting handouts have continued without interruption, even during The Great Recession. Elected officials believe the only way to keep big business from picking up and moving to another city or state is to keep making them offers they cannot afford to refuse. But local taxpayers can’t afford to make up the difference. While the economy was melting down from 2008-2010, Philadelphia-based Comcast scored $18 million in tax abatements, credits, and other government handouts. At the same time, local officials faced with upside down city budgets enacted controversial new taxes and business fees on some of the city’s smallest businesses, ranging from bloggers, freelance writers, to independent contractors and consultants.

Pennsylvania is easily among the top-tier of states handing out corporate welfare. In 2011, the Commonwealth collected $4.89 billion in business taxes. But it promptly returned $4.84 billion in tax credits to the state’s biggest businesses. Government benefits for Philadelphia for-profits totaled over $200 million that year alone. Many of the state’s biggest companies receive nearly as much in tax credits, grants, and other benefits that they pay in state and local taxes. Some incentive programs are so broadly written, businesses doing “business as usual” qualify for enormous tax breaks.

Take, for example, Comcast subsidiary QVC. Pennsylvania’s “film incentive program” handed the home shopping network $7.05 million in tax credits just for hawking jewelry from studios inside Pennsylvania. It did not matter QVC had been pitching products from those studios before, during and after the subsidy program handed out the award. Comcast had no plans to move the studios either, but it pocketed the corporate welfare just the same.

While Comcast was building up enough financial resources to acquire NBC-Universal, Philadelphia’s city budget was in tatters. Officials looking for creative ways to boost the local tax base didn’t tap Comcast for the money. Instead, they declared bloggers were now required to get a “business license” to operate within city limits. In fact, the city argued, every person, partnership, association and corporation engaged in a business, profession or other for-profit activity within the city of Philadelphia must now file a Business Privilege Tax Return. The cost just to apply for the business license? $300. Sorry Nathanial, the lemonade stand has to close because you didn’t cough up the $300 before erecting the card table in the front yard.

The “blogger tax” appeared to be sufficiently overreaching (thanks to excoriating coverage in the local media) to provoke the city to begin to phase it out, but no worries — Philadelphia has since found another source of revenue — Comcast? No, of course not. The real money is in taxing strippers. From The Philly Post:

So Mayor Nutter’s effort to tax lap dances—which reached its, er, climax last week in a Philadelphia courtroom — might be somewhat sympathetic if it had been cast as a way to crack down on the general level of skeeviness in the city. After all, it’s a fairly common rule of economics that if you want less of something, just tax it. That’s the logic behind Nutter’s anti-obesity effort to put a tax on sugary drinks, after all.

But nobody’s making that argument. (To be fair, City Hall hasn’t made much of a public argument of any sort, with officials saying they can’t comment on pending litigation.) So we’re forced to assume that the city, always desperate for revenue, is simply finding new ways of taxing its citizens — going after strippers the way you and I might check the folds of the couch for loose change.

And since strip club attendees already pay the city’s amusement tax just to enter the strip club, it seems reasonable to conclude that asking them to pay again when they witness actual stripping is thus a direct tax on stripping itself. It’s a tax on work.

There probably are not enough deep-pocketed lap dancers inside the City of Brotherly Love to cover Comcast’s tax tab. Just for building its new headquarters in Center City Philadelphia, the company was awarded an extra $42.75 million in government subsidies. But it did not stop there. In 2011, the cable company received an extra $18 million in miscellaneous gratitude corporate welfare categorized generally as “assorted grants and credits.” No other Philadelphia business came close to competing with Comcast’s taxpayer-provided gift basket. In return, Comcast showed its gratitude to Pennsylvania by declaring itself a Delaware-based corporation that was exempt from paying the state’s corporate income tax.

A Michigan man last week opened his front door only to find AT&T’s efforts to install U-verse for a neighbor tore up his front yard and he isn’t even a customer.

Broadband Reports‘ AT&T forum member “riekl” in Macomb discovered AT&T’s service “upgrade” for the neighbors left him with a front yard “downgrade” consisting of a long strip of dead grass, a potentially undermined driveway, and no idea who will pay to repair the damage.

“The only utility easement is a 20 foot strip in my back yard,” he wrote.

AT&T decided running cables well inside the Macomb man’s front yard and beneath his driveway was fine. So was leaving without bothering to repair the damage.

An AT&T ‘Right of Way’ manager was eventually dispatched to the property and quickly conceded AT&T buried its lines well outside of the utility easement. The company is now making arrangements to repair the resident’s lawn.

“He also apologized as their techs are told to always notify the homeowner when crossing property,” said the irked resident.

But the story may not be over. AT&T’s cable is now a permanent feature beneath the non-customer’s front yard, which could create some issues if AT&T assumes it now has an ‘effective’ easement and will be free to repair or replace the cable in the same area at their discretion.

AT&T has a long history of using contractors that do not always favor the correct solution over an expedient one.

But at least they buried the cable this time.

Last fall, a Texas resident arrived home to find AT&T had installed a new line for one of their customers by stringing it across the top of the neighbor’s back lawn, where it remained untouched and unburied for an extended period.

Helderle

A Charter Cable technician from St. Charles, Mo. was convicted of tying up and sexually assaulting an O’Fallon customer after she reported him for asking her out in an unwanted text message.

Jurors deliberated for only about an hour before convicting 22-year old Michael Helderle on four felony counts, recommending a 75 year prison sentence.

Helderle was employed by Communications Unlimited, a contractor performing work on behalf of Charter Communications.

When the victim requested a service call from Charter on Dec. 4, Helderle showed up. He obtained her cell phone number and asked her out on a date later that evening. The victim reported the text message to Charter and Helderle was fired.

The next day, Helderle broke into her apartment while she was on a video chat with her boyfriend, who was 1,700 miles away on an Air Force base. He called authorities after witnessing Helderle in the apartment.

Helderle handcuffed and tied up the victim, gagged and sexually assaulted her, covering her with a pillow. He then stole her cell phone and cash. When police arrived, Helderle placed a knife to the victim’s throat and threatened her if she called out.

Helderle eventually escaped the apartment while police untied the victim. He was arrested hours later.

Charter defended its actions after the incident:

“Charter recognizes that it is a privilege to be allowed into customers’ homes to install our services. Our customer’s safety is of utmost importance and precautions are taken seriously. We require criminal background checks on all in-home contractors prior to performing any work for Charter.”

It was not enough to avoid offering Helderle employment.

Cable operators use third-party contractors to cut costs and sometimes limit liability. Critics contend third-party contractors often use lower standards of employment and compensate their workers at a considerably lower rate of pay with fewer benefits.

[flv width=”640″ height=”380″]http://www.phillipdampier.com/video/KSDK St Louis James Helderle charged with tying up woman 12-06-12.flv[/flv]

KSDK in St. Louis covered the break-in and sexual assault back in December in this video report.  (2 minutes)

[flv width=”640″ height=”380″]http://www.phillipdampier.com/video/KSDK St Louis James Helderle convicted of burglary and sodomy 5-16-13.flv[/flv]

KSDK followed up on the story last week, noting the Charter Cable subcontractor was convicted of burglary and sodomy.  (2 minutes)